Relationship Fall Out - A Heartbreak- How to cope up??

Now a days the probability of a relationship falling apart has increased many folds due to number of reasons and differences that have creeped between the genders and which i have been constantly taking about in my trailing posts. Still there are people who are left with heart breaks and heart aches; which are too difficult to handle and cope with. It's not that we don't want to come out of them but then situations become such that we are left with hardly any choices. I find so may unmarried and married couples now a days having a great trouble n managing the relationship fall out. It's just that they become clueless of what to do and how to handle the issues pertaining to that. Let's understand the situation completely from start to the very end and try and establish a way to tackle such issues; though the application of the solution may tend to change according to your present situation.

We all know for a fact that all times can't be good times, but then we still believe that individually we are having the worst time that any one could ever face in a relationship fall out. Now that to start with, is our first mistake by far and which sets other things in motion. Let's first of all consider the following points before we jump to the end in a fall-out.

1. It certainly is not only our fault - it's a mutual mistake or a misunderstanding

2. The relationship has not changed over night - the situation was there earlier as well; it's just that we never saw it or felt it to be so serious

3. It's not that it has just happened to you in the whole wide world  - you are certainly not the first to end up with a broken relationship, so stop having pity on yourself

4. Just don't jump to conclusions; there is already a lot happening in your mind - try avoiding being a little judge mental for some time, let things settle down and then make conclusions.

5. Don't just start bitching about your ex - specially guys stop telling your friends what you did and what you didn't and girls please stop comparisons. The situation calls for an emotional burst but then you don't want to sound creepy to people around you.

6. And finally stop putting too much pressure on yourself - Trust me nothing changes if you stop eating or just lock your self up; you just end up tormenting yourself.

Now considering the aforesaid points which we most usually do; we tend to emotionally sabotage ourselves and people around us without even understanding that things won't change because of this. We need to understand one good point for this fall-out; that things just don't work out all the time and that too that easy. Relationship involves a lot of input, when the output is a breakdown, we tend to think over the input we gave in rather than focusing on overcoming the breakdown.

When a relationship falls apart, people stick to this age old saying that time would actually heal up everything and god would certainly have had something good in his mind before putting you through this. I say that this is just a saying which has nothing to do with the healing of your relationship wound. What I personally believe is that "It's not the time that helps you heal from a relationship wound, but what you do with that time during a relationship break down". What we plan on doing in that time is what helps us in overcoming that relationship crisis and makes us emotionally level again; where in we are fit and ready to move on to a next relationship. Now this is a methodology that i call "  The Rediscovery Period". This period is very important for a person who has had a fall-out, because he/she needs time for themselves to cope up with that break down. Usually people tend to go out with their friends, relatives and family and do those crazy things that they always wanted to do which they couldn't while they were tied up in a relationship.

You know we sometimes tend to forget to look on the bright side of the break down, it actually transcribes into a newer self belief and freedom that we had always craved for and we always missed, it lets us be who we are and that is what we forget when we are in a relationship. Believe me or not we tend to change when we enter into a relationship set up and that's normal but then what's not normal is the way we operate - that's when we step into trouble. Actually we all are very selfish people, we just want all the good to happen to us and when trouble steps its feet in our lives we start to blame. So the long and the short of the story is that we all need to see the larger perspective in our relationship, how can fall-out be so bad with a person whom we were completely in love with a while ago, things tend to change but then we need to handle change in a manner that we don't hurt ourselves and others whom we used to love. Communicating your feelings never hurts, if you choose the right time and the moment and if you don't then stay put for a fall-out.