Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Love Lost in a Relationship



Most of us have this trouble, that we start feeling that all love is lost in our relationship at some point of time in the tenure of our relationship with our companion. This is actually a tricky feeling to have, which can actually cause you to be over cautious, overprotective and highly demanding. It’s not that it’s not a good feeling to have but the problem is that this starts small and grows up to become a big issue. Loss is always accompanied by grief, sorrow and comparison from your present state to the past. Love Lost is mostly a common phenomenon now a days as we have become so mobile that we have loads of things that we have to look up to – a social media life, a personal life, a professional life, a companion life, a friend’s life that we hardly have time to juggle between all of them. We have to be physically or digitally be present everywhere, so that we have a grasp of everything. We don't want to lose out on anything; we always want to be the part of the action.

Now when we have all these things to take care, we somehow tend to put our relationship aside quiet for some time, thinking that our partner would understand the issue of time management and the commitments that we have. We just want them to understand that though we love them, care for them we still are busy. Sometimes they do tend to understand but when this becomes a phenomenon for quite some time, now this is when the problem of Love Lost starts to creep in. We start to have these assumptions that may be our companion is not interested in us or maybe he/she is seeing someone else. This gives rise to fear and that creates a way for insecurity to creep into our relationships. Insecurity causes unwanted tension, strain and over demanding attitude from us. We start changing from the loving and caring companion to someone who is always thinking on the aspect as to what is our partner doing and we start constantly breathing down his neck. We start suspecting his actions and behavior and to top that if things are not working on well between the two of you which are not, the situation is getting worse. You start getting irritated at some little things, which you never used to care about earlier and you start treating yourself as the boss and start dictating terms. 

The most important part of this problem is that after all these things happen, you start to compare the situations now and before, which leads to creation of a void between you and your companion which are unaware of. This usually leads to cranky fights and you getting pissed off even at jokes or sometimes irrational behavior as well. The fights now become an integral part of your daily routine with you and your partner. On the other hand your partner is unable to understand the turmoil that you are going through reason being because it is all buried deep within you which you also don't know. Even though we try to sort things out it usually doesn't work because these things have got imbibed in us for the amount of time we have spent thinking on them. To top all these things, the worst part is yet to come and when the situations grow out of bounds, you start thinking why at the first place did we even enter into a relationship and trust me when I say this; this is not the situation that you want to be into. This situation only brings out the worst in anyone. We start fighting and we unintentionally hurt the person we have loved with all the might just for some silly reasons and we just want to put our relationship to the grave.

Situations always grow out of bounds in Love Lost Situations and we hardly know about this. We become so impermeable that we even don't understand the irrationality behind our actions. We just keep on acting because of the fear of losing our loved ones. We should ideally be the ones talking all the time about our relationships with our companion and trust me only talking does not do anything. We need to show our love and care for the ones we actually do. Keeping our emotions and feelings to ourselves we can't justify the fact that our companion didn't understand us. We are very different people when we get into this Zone of Love Lost, we entirely change to someone we even don't know. 

So it is better that we should speak out our emotions and make our companion realize that we require love and affection and if there are sentiments and love in your relationship the tide would again turn to your end; you would be riding the wave rather than trying to escape it. We should learn one very good attribute for man’s best friend-a dog, that when we require attention, care and love just cuddle around your loved one. That involuntary hug would say a thousand words and would portray all your love. That one thing could change things for you, be the ones to initiate these talks and start taking action, start showing your emotions rather than sitting with fear of losing your loved one. What matters is what you do to show your love, leave the rest to time.

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