One Sided Love - A Half Love Story

How many times have you been through a feeling where you love a person and that person doesn't love you back and when you are ready to do anything for their attention, their expression and their affection to you. Trust me you are not at all alone, there are people to keep you in good company. This is something that you would have come up with time and again, either with yourself or with your set of friends. This is a really a weird feeling to have, where you are ready to give in your time, money and most important of all your feelings to a single person. Weird isn't it?? Yeah rite, it is and you would now feel quite stupid to have done all that. We all do feel funny when we realize what stupidity we all did, but trust me this was the foreground where we learnt quite a lot about feelings and relationships and the factors governing them.

To be frank it isn't that bad a feeling to have, you tend to fall for the person who doesn't love you back maybe due to the lack of attention he/she pays to you and actually doesn't realize your existence until someone tells them that you too exist. It is a tendency to love the things that are out of your reach and the ones that don't give you that attention you seek. It becomes an impulse for you to have them in your life. It all starts with hate and then that hate actually changes into a form of negative love kinda feeling and then you start to feel weird. Weird in a way that you start to realize that you are actually started to fall for that person you were supposed to hate. You start to see those small little expressions from them and all the weird stuff starts to rotate around you, you start thinking that may be that person is the one that you were meant to be with. You start feeling that all the things are propelling you to be with that person, you seem that all things are working towards doing that. You find yourself in the middle of a situation where in you can't control your emotions and neither can you help yourself being with that   person. Things seem far more stretched than ever, your friends start to notice that change in your behavior and that way you come across. They won't understand the creepy way you have started to put up but still there is a chance that they might come to know about your feelings if you spill the beans out for them.

Now coming to the situation where in you have started showing emotions to this other person, you start to feel weirdly good at times, thinking that maybe this is how it was meant to be and stuff like that. You start seeking attention from that person because you want him/her to notice you out of the crowd. This ain't bad my friends, but then there is always this risk of actually you hurting yourself in this process. One sided feelings and emotions won't take your relationship to a distance, it's just like a car showing empty fuel tank and you never know when it would stop working. Don't let this thing happen to you, because you would have started loving that person with all your might and shown all your dedication to him/her without actually thinking what they feel about you. Relationship is a two sided seesaw, involving two people who actually feel the same for each other. It is no good loving that one person who can never be in your life as it only takes that time away from you and hurts you badly and you start thinking that the world is over for you. Trust me sometimes even though you are with a person whom you love without any reciprocation from his/her side, it is worst than being lonely. You are lonely in a relationship and that is the biggest trouble. Loving a person who does not love you back is the worst feeling that you can have and to add to it when you come across that the same person has fallen for someone else, you start thinking and comparing yourself with that person, feeling was I not that good enough. When you have that feeling you start losing a part of you and within no time you are a changed personality and this is a thing you realize over a period of time. We have this weird ability. we all have where we think that we can make a person fall in love with us with all the attics and tactics from our side, but what we forget is that this all relationship is all about feelings and no gimmicks and one day the other person would see through this and it would all end on a bad note. We can't make a person fall in love with us until that other person wants to fall in for us, then that is a mutual feeling. It is no good loving a person who does not love you back, when you don't get that love back, it hurts real bad.

I know it is weird that sometimes when we approach someone we love we come to know that she was also the one who was madly in love with you, but was frisky about taking the initiative and telling her feelings to you. The best alternative to all the lovers out there is that please try your heart out once for that person whom you love, if he/she has any such feeling they would reciprocate and if you want to play the waiting game please be ready to face the consequences at last, i know we all have this tendency where in we overlook the future possibilities so that we can be with that person, but then as I say that time doesn't wait for anyone, it didn't for me and it would not for you. But I would still try and I say you must also try, don't let your love story be only with you, let it out tell that person you him/her and leave the rest to their feelings and appreciate their decision as well because my friends love is nothing but a thread of feelings that attaches one to the other for eternity.

The Emotional You - A Trouble in paradise

This post is dedicated to all the girls out there and i personally am obliged to a girl that has motivated me to write this piece, she thought i may be a chauvinist. I may not have done that exactly but taking to her criticism i am dedicating this to her.
Emotions are a very powerful tool of conveying what is boiling down in your heart and mind. To put in exact words its like a mirror to your inner self, a description that allows people to know what you are going through. Every one has their own opinions and perceptions about emotions, but trust me people are very good at giving advise related to emotional issues. They love sharing their feelings and that they are adding their own judge-mental errors to it involuntarily. Now coming to the concept of emotions; its very well known that both the genders are emotional but guys are a little more emotionally introvert  - the tendency to show their emotions in larger groups is limited whilst girls are a little emotionally extrovert. Guys have this ability to actually hide their emotions from others because of their manly egoist concept which actually says that they are the stronger ones and can't act emotionally - which guys imply as that its very girlish to act so. While girls on the contrary are emotionally more expressive, so tendency to portray the same in groups increases many folds.

Fact is that Girls/ Women/ Females are the ones that complete Guys/ Men / Male vice-verse; you accept this or not but then we crave for the companionship of one another. This is the truth, if we don't  have one, we want one and if we have one, we are always on the prowl of something better (in our relationship or out of it). That's our nature, we are like that and we are meant to be that ways, we may not start the comparisons intentionally but then they were always there. Now coming to the Emotional connect, we have this tendency to have the emotional connect within the genders and when the relation starts to fall out so do the emotions. The relationship falls out within our hearts and emotions have an exterior vent of falling - may be expressions, tears, behavior, attitude, habits etc. Now coming to this as said before girls have the tendency to be emotionally extrovert so they show it and we see it coming- don't we guys?? Guys would generally talk to their friends or would take to drinking or would go in this deep acute obstinate black hole which takes weeks or some times year to come out of. Girls come out faster and the reason is they are much eager and they want out. 

Girls you are emotionally both weak and strong, weak when you are having a fall-out and strong when you overcome that fallout. But now when you are weak, there arises a problem i call- "The Emotional You". A situation where you are helpless; you don't know what is happening to you; you have a strained behavior and you constraint yourself to all the humanly possible self atrocities. Now this a situation where you are emotionally weak and need support to gain in your lost self confidence and where you are in need of some one that can put you back together in terms of your emotions and holistically as a person. This is what i call the "Troubled Waters", reason so simple to understand when you are emotionally weak, people think that you are a piece of dead meat and nothing else and take you for granted and you let them also. Guys show you support and give you a shoulder to cry; you start getting attached emotionally, now that's the tricky part here. You now guys know that when in need of emotional support, if they lend you their shoulder their is a higher probability of them have a better chance of being closer to you in every respect. You may not understand that at time; what is going through because you are already in a emotional turmoil and you need to rectify your past situation so the focus on the current one is less. People out there are very eager to actually pounce on this situation. Now this can actually lead to a fall-out and you would never know what struck you. To forget the past you just get involved in the present without even taking notes for what had happened and what caused it- this leads to trouble - and this is problem even though you come out stronger of a fall-out.

Girls you need to understand that vulnerabilities make you weak but then you don't need to wear down under pressure. You have this rational button that you need to put on; and switch off your emotional button. People around you would always show sympathy and want to be with you through this period; but then it ain't that simple. The ones who actually understand you; have been there for you always when ever you had your back to the wall- don't just forget that. It's similar to a fire, a fire can actually burn down a house and can also provide warmth, but there is always a difference. Don't let guys take advantage of your emotions, sometimes they may do it on purpose and sometimes involuntarily but then their expectations start to mount and they think that they own you for their support, which ain't true. You require support but then that is unconditional, support with conditions becomes a favor, which you are supposed to return and trust me this return business ain't good. 

Girls you need to understand that you are required to give yourself time before letting yourself in on something again, don't make a weakness a pathway for trouble in future. Guys i know you have a lot of love to give, but my friend show it, don't ask for anything in return. Give and take won't last long. If you love her, be there for her but don't make her be with you, make her understand what went wrong and how she can correct it and then may be she can see you in the picture with her, if she thinks you fit the bill. I believe that though you guys need to put in efforts to get your love; so put in the efforts but then don't expect anything out of it (i know for sure it's difficult, but then had it been easy you would have not been here in the first place), it's just like a game of chess, where in the other player may castle his queen but then the one who wins is the one who has played the longest to capture the queen for a check-mate, because from there on the queen is all yours.