Sunday, January 13, 2013

How do i know if there is some thing wrong in my Relationship?

I got this from a friend of mine who shared with me his concerns regarding his relationship issue, asking how can he know that something is wrong in a relationship ? Now that my friends is a tough one to answer. It's not that this is chronic and would have symptoms for the same which we can underline and take the necessary precautions. We have to be cautious and that's what can save us from the trouble. Most of us have this issue of finding what has gone wrong with our relationship. We try and start seeing this in a different aspect and start observing things microscopically and sometimes we over do things and over ride our limits as well, just trying to salvage of what is left and trying to gain what we lost.

Can we actually come to know that something is wrong ?? The answer is yes, for sure. We can come to know, if we want to know. You know sometimes the outcome to a situation is actually our own doings which we just ignore. At times we may think that we are acting perfectly but then we may not be. Somethings perfection may be the hindrance and times may be not being perfect may be the glitch. Then how can we actually do the rightful thing, do we need some kind of a balance to sort this mess out. Do we?? No we actually don't. We actually need to act according to the situation. We have to be perfect not being  so perfect, we all expect our partner to be imperfectly perfect. But then we are not super humans, we ain't those people who can act perfectly all the time, We have the right to make mistakes and we also have this right to make up for those mistakes. If you are with the right person we will actually see that he/she would see the point and would accept you for the rightful things that you are doing.

We are people who would actually remain happy when things are good and when things go for a toss we think that it was all right till yesterday and all of a sudden what wrong happened?? We don't realize at that time, we were all this time ignoring this that were happening right in front of us, we chose to ignore them for the sake of our convenience and  just took that time to be happy. We all are right in that very aspect, we have the right to enjoy and why should we even care, but then we are the same people who care when the things go for a toss. When we are the same people, then why do we act so deferentially ?? This is who we are, this is the way we act and we would only learn while we make mistakes and take a cue from that mistake. But the point is that why should we??

We have to actually be observant enough to have the cues from our relationship, in different situations. We sometimes take things lightly, but then we have to change this habit of ours. We have to be the ones to be proactive. Things change and so do people, we have to change according to the situations and time, there may be times when we act in a particular manner but then may be the situation is completely different so we have to act accordingly. I know this is tough, but when the going gets tough, the tough get going. We have to be patient, observant and reciprocative enough to fix things. There is not a particular check list that i can mention and you an grid yourself in a similar manner and try to find out the group that you fall into. You will yourself know when things go wrong only if you have seen the thick of things and you have been the one that has had a feel of things in past. There are no symptoms that I can list here, like uneasiness of your partner, agitated behavior and not being happy in your company. It can so happen that even when he/she is happy you have some problem. Some people don't try to show of their emotions and we can't have a category for things going wrong in a relation. So just see to this that you are the one that is all what i mentioned. Please don't try and barge into some one's personal life, sometimes people need to be alone, even your partners. They need some time off for some time, they deserve it and you have to give them. please don't barge into some one's personal life, this can add to your relationship woes.